


Hitchhiking

by TheGreatZura



Category: Love Live! School Idol Project, Love Live! Sunshine!!
Genre: Cop!Chika, Cop!You, Crack, Everyone Has Issues, F/F, Hitchhiking, It's kinda hitchhiking but at the same time it isn't, Minor Ayase Eli/Toujou Nozomi, Sadist!Mari, You has no feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-06
Updated: 2017-08-06
Packaged: 2018-12-12 03:40:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11728740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGreatZura/pseuds/TheGreatZura
Summary: Yoshiko attempts to go hitchhiking, it doesn't end well. (Squidtastic Universe).(You could say this is what Yoshiko does in her free time.)





	Hitchhiking

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this out of boredom lololol. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this terrible fic. Without further ado.....

It was a ridiculous idea, ignited by a couple of ridiculous remarks. Yoshiko knew this was a bad idea, but she could never back down when faced with an challenge. After all, she was the great Squid Yohane. She had to uphold her reputation as a fallen squid. Not that she had one to begin with. Yoshiko was merely known as the Crazy Squid Girl to the city. It wasn’t that nice of a title, but she didn’t mind. Though, over time people started to comment that the Crazy Squid Girl was starting to be less crazy. Some folks were worried that something might have happened to her, most just thought she was finally growing out of her Squid phase.

In reality, Yoshiko had been playing matchmaker for her fellow squid Eli Ayase for the past few weeks or so. It was certainly very entertaining. Soon, she realized her reputation was at stake! She had to do something crazy again, her street jump scares were getting boring. Nobody was surprised anymore. Lost, Yoshiko decided to ask Eli what she should do.  
Eli responded with. “Just jump on a car or something.” Yoshiko hugged her in response and ran off into the middle of the street. And that was why Yohane was running around in the street, yodeling.A truck was coming straight for her, Yoshiko grinned. It was perfect, she jumped onto the truck and tried to pull herself up over the windshield.

“Hey, what is that?” the driver of the truck asked, her chartreuse eyes glinting as she peered at the gray thing climbing over her windshield.  
“IT’S A HUGE BUG!” Her brown haired friend in the backseat screamed.  
“Just kill it,” her blue haired friend said, as she casually skimmed over her newspaper.  
“AUUGGGGGH, IT HAS RED EYES!” The brown haired girl screamed.  
“Just calm the fudge down Dia,” The blue haired girl, said sighing as she put down her newspaper.  
“KANAN, IT’S A DEMON!” Dia was hyperventilating now.  
“WIpe it off, Mari,” Kanan said, sighing. The driver, Mari nodded and pressed the wipe button.  
Outside, Yoshiko suddenly noticed a windshield wiper going straight for her.  
“OUUUCHH!” she cried as wiper slapped her several times. She looked into the windshield and mouthed, DON’T YOU DARE, HUMAN! The driver smiled, deviously as the wiper came in for the final blow. Yoshiko was sent flying off the windshield. “AYYEEEEEE!” She screamed as she soared into the sky.  
“Wow, it’s flying,” Mari remarked. “SHINY!” Kanan rolled her eyes and went back to reading her newspaper.

Meanwhile, in the sky Yoshiko had flown up and was now falling down gracefully.  
“How perfect, a fallen squid falling from the sky,” Yoshiko murmured happily to herself. She suddenly was met with impact. She landed face-first in the middle of an intersection. “Oww,” Yoshiko muttered. The yellow car that was about to drive over her, skidded to a halt. The driver and the passenger both ran out.

“Oh, my God are you okay, zura?!” the honey brown haired girl came out.  
“Does it look like I’m okay, human?!” Yoshiko scowled. The brown haired girl, cocked her head.  
“Human, zura?”a she raised her eyebrows “Do you not remember me Yoshiko~chan zura?”. Yoshiko immediately sat up.  
“I, the great squid, Yohane have fallen from grace!” her voice deepening as she struck a pose. The brown haired girl facepalmed and turned to her red haired friend.  
“Ruby, could you please call the police, zura?” She said calmly. Ruby nodded and began dialing the phone. At this, Yoshiko jumped up and suddenly began to strangle the brown haired girl.  
“How could you betray me like this, ZURAMARU?!” Yoshiko wailed, as she shook the brown haired girl back and forth.  
“Hanamaru~chan!” Ruby said, in a distressed tone. She had finished calling and the police were coming anytime soon. Hanamaru only gave her a reassuring smile  
“Oh, you remember me!” Hanamaru said grinning brightly as Yoshiko was dragged off by the authorities.  
“You’re under arrest,” the ash-grey haired police officer said as she restrained Yoshiko and dragged her off. “We’ll take it from here!” She saluted Ruby and Hanamaru as she handed Yoshiko to her orange haired comrade.

When they got to the station, they pushed Yoshiko towards a chair and seated her there. The nametag on the desk read , Officer You Watanabe.  
“Ok, so first of all,” The ash~ grey haired girl You, Yoshiko assumed started. “What were you doing in the middle of the street?” Her azure eyes burned holes in Yoshiko’s face.  
Yoshiko gulped. “I-I can explain!”  
“You’d better!” The orange haired cop who had escorted Yoshiko into the chair snapped.  
“ I was hitchhiking!” Yoshiko blurted out, she was panicking. You raised her eyebrows and looked at the orange haired cop. They seemed to be having a silent conversation.  
“Really now?” You said. Yoshiko nodded. Suddenly the officer started laughing furiously.  
“What’s so funny?” Yoshiko furrowed her brow, she had never felt so insulted.  
“Who does that wearing a squid suit?” The officer was trying to stifle her laughter. The orange haired girl next to her was trying not to smile.  
“This is not a outfit!” Yoshiko scowled. “I’m A FALLEN SQUID!”  
“And, I’m the president of the United States,” The orange haired girl said, guffawing.  
“CURSE YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN TO COME!” Yoshiko suddenly screamed raising her hands up.  
“Hold up, don’t do that,” You said, holding a hand up. “We still need to ask why you were hitchhiking.” Yoshiko sighed as she put her hands down and began to tell her tale.  
“Wow,” the orange haired cop said.  
“Now, that’s just sad.” You was sniffling and brandishing a handkerchief out of nowhere.  
“What a heart~wrenching tale!” She sobbed, falling back into her chair.  
“Not really,” Yoshiko muttered.  
“Hey!”You scowled. “I’m trying to show some empathy before I throw you into a cell!”  
“How kind of you,” Yoshiko said sarcastically.  
“Can I throw her in yet?” the orange haired cop asked.  
“Yeah, Chika,” You said sighing.  
“WAIT!” a familiar voice yelled. Yoshiko turned to see Eli and Nozomi running towards her.  
Yoshiko’s brightened up a bit. “ You came to save me!”  
“Quiet you!” Eli glared at her and turned to face the cops.  
“And who are you?” You asked.  
“She’s my cousin,” Eli lied smoothly as she pointed to Yoshiko. “She’s just a bit touched in the head.” Yoshiko scowled in response. Eli grit her teeth and scowled at her.  
“Mm fair enough,” the officer said blankly.  
“I’m sorry that she caused you a lot of trouble,” Eli bowed.  
“No problem, keep her on a leash next time,” the oranged haired cop barked. Eli nodded and dragged Yoshiko wordlessly out the door.  
“I-” Yoshiko began.  
“Not a peep out of you!” Eli seethed. “I’ll deal with you when we get back to the apartment building.” Yoshiko paled and followed Eli wordlessly down the street. If looks could kill, Yoshiko would probably be dead by now as Eli was giving her a really dark look.  
“Don’t worry I don’t think Elichi will do anything too bad,” Nozomi said, offering Yoshiko a kind smile. Oh no, she’d be ever so happy to torture me, Yoshiko thought to herself glumly as she followed after Eli and Nozomi.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this fic! It was pretty fun to write lolol. Also, feel free to comment and stuff. See you next time. CIAO! *teleports*


End file.
